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dear birthmother letters


Is Infant Adoption really a "Christian" thing to do?
by Mary Andrews

Are you single and pregnant, looking for an adoption agency? I've been noticing that many domestic infant adoption agencies have the word "Christian" in their names or else they are associated with a Christian church social services. This certainly gives a lot of people a feeling of trust that these agencies are doing God's work.

Is the transfer of children from their own naive or vulnerable parents and grandparents to unrelated infertile people really something that God wants people to do?

What does the Bible say about adoption?


"By Faith, Moses Refused To Be Called Son of The Pharaoh's Daughter." - Hebrews: 11:24

I am a mother who has lost her infant son to adoption. Imagine how horrified I was when I learned the truth - babies who are separated from their mothers in infancy lose trust in those around them. To them it seems that their own mother apparently "abandoned" them - so they fear that others they love might abandon them too. Adoption removes a child from her own family - and removes all the ancestors from a child. Adoption is pure magic - of the "smoke and mirrors" variety. A fraudulently amended birth certificate is issued to make it appear that the child is the real offspring of the people who adopted him - to make it seem as if the adopters have achieved their dream of being "real parents".

The rationalizations for infant adoption change over time and to keep up with the market for babies. At one point people were "saving" babies from being known as "bastards". They claimed it was in the mother's "best interests" to be "saved" from being known as whores, and returned to a "virginal" state so they could marry. No doubt it was in the "Christian" father's best interests to be able to skate away free of responsiblity for his child - especially if he had plans to be in politics.

Eventually people decided not to refer to children as "illegitimate" or "bastards". Many more single mothers began keeping their children. More fathers began to take responsiblity for their children, whether they were married to their children's mothers or not.

But then more people began delaying childbearing in favor of their careers - delaying so long that by the time they "tried" they found themselves infertile. There was a growing market for babies for adoption. Single people and gay people began adopting, not just infertile couples. The rationale for removing single mother's healthy infants changed: People began to say that single parents are OK, but babies MUST live with wealthy people, with people who are "mature" - or even elderly. And even more scary, moms were told they would be "heros" and "saints" for making their babies available for adoption.

Is 17 too young to raise a baby? It's a lot of work to raise a child - but it's worse to wonder every day of your life how your child is doing. It's far worse to discover later that your child felt horribly abandoned.

Is infant adoption a "Christian" thing to do?

Mary the mother of Jesus was a teenage, less affluent "unwed" mother. God chose HER to be Jesus' mother, not some wealthy adoptress - not even in so-called "open" adoption.



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