"birth"Mothers Exploited By Adoption
   “Adoption is not about unwanted babies — it is about unwanted mothers.”

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Note: The terms

"unwed" mother, "birthmother", "biological" parents

make a parent appear to be less than the mother or father they are. These terms dehumanize and limit the parent's role to that of an incubator.

"Dear Birthmother" and "Dear Birthparent" letters soliciting for healthy babies for adoption are despicable.

Using the honest terms "mother", "single mother" or "natural mother" help the public to understand that real family members are being separated to obtain babies for adoption.

 

Adoption in Canada - in WHOSE Best Interest?
By Karen Lynn

The history of adoption in Canada reveals that adoption has always been in the best interests of adoptive parents, this despite the rhetoric of "the best interests of the child" often cited in legislation. Legal adoption started in Ontario in 1921 and secrecy in adoption was enshrined in 1927 at the urging of a lobbying group of adoptive parents.

Today all adoptions are secret in Canada unless an open adoption plan was agreed upon by the natural parents and the adopters, yet there is no legal provision for open adoptions - they are not legally enforcable. Adult adoptees in B.C., the Northwest Territories and Nunavut have access to their identifying records (their original birth certificates) but very few adopted children (not adults) have this opportunity. Adult adoptees can apply for identifying information in other provinces, however if the natural parent does not agree, this information may not be available to them and still, under any condition, they can NEVER get their original birth certificates. There is no other group in society which must submit to this travesty.

The voices of natural parents have also been almost completely silenced by the secrecy in legislation. Again, in B.C., NWT and Nunavut natural parents can apply for information about their children lost to adoption and in a few other provinces where the waiting list is long but reunion is always mediated by government officials who are often unsuccessful. If the adoption of embryos is approved, there are apparently no provisions being considered for the rights of natural parents who suffer life-long grief in adoption and who, I would assume, would experience similar effects to those of us who have lost our children through adoption.

For adoptees, in addition to the existential question of identity, tremendous issues surrounding the loss of their original families often result in low self-esteem and dysfunction in forming relationships, and much more. The medical issues are huge - many have died as a result of not being allowed to know their natural families medical situations. I have a friend who is an adoptee who searched and found her first family about seventeen years ago. A couple of years ago her first mother casually suggested that she should have her eyes checked since glaucoma runs in her family. The checkup revealed Ocular Melanoma, a disease which could have killed her, yet she was able to get early treatment which successfully stopped the disease. Now ALL the members of her first family is watching out for this inheritable disease.

People usually forget that adoption is about finding families for children and not finding children for families. As in conventional adoption, it is assumed in the consideration of allowing the adoption of frozen embryos that all people have the right to have children. I believe that it is a privilege, not a right. The history of adoption if you study it in depth demonstrates that the real story is all about the adopters with little or no genuine consideration for the children and their natural parents.

I urge you to investigate the money trail in adoption which directly relates to the adoption of frozen embryos. The adoption industry is huge, paying the salaries of thousands of social workers, lawyers, government workers and medical staff. In the U.S. an analysis by Market Data Enterprises (found on the internet) reveals a sum of $1.4 billion with a projected growth rate of 11% per annum. I have no idea what the figure amounts to in Canada. You can get a rough idea by simply typing in "adoption" in any search engine.

Adoption is all about loss for adoptees and natural parents. Infertility is about loss too, but adoption is definitely not a solution to infertility although this is often an assumption. Adoptees know that they are the second choice of their adoptive parents. Do we really need to be "building families" without consulting all of the stakeholders in adoption?

Sincerely,

Karen Lynn, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
President
Canadian Council of Natural Mothers
klynn@ica.net

 
 
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