"birthmoms" Exploited By Adoption
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Open Adoption? "I fought with the adoption agency till he was 6 months old for the visitation I was promised."- Beckie


In October of 1999, I met two people who went by the presumed names of Julie and Bill. I met them at a local restaurant. After talking for about 2 hours, I decided I would like them to adopt my son who was due in March.  After telling them this, they became extremely nice. I invited them to be part of all my doctorís appointments that they did come to. They said call their cell phone, day or night if I needed them. So I did. 

On March 4 of 2000 I went into labour with my son.  After about 3 hours of hard labor, the baby I named Benjamin Robert Siegel (presumably now renamed Nicholas Glen). They were both present for the delivery and came by a few times when I was in the hospital. While I was in the hospital they promised I could see my son whenever and I could call their cell phone whenever I wanted. They even gave me a letter that says,"This is not the end of our relationship, itís just the beginning." 

On March 6 (Monday) at about 8pm, I turned my precious son over to these people. Again they promised they would keep in touch. They gave me a post office box number and I already had their cell phone number. They kept their end of the bargain for about 3 months. I requested that they send letters a little less frequently being that it was hard on me. So they did. But then when I was feeling better, I asked they send me more. Well they didn't, they closed their post office box and shut off their cell phone and cut all ties. 

When the baby was about 3 months old. I fought with the adoption agency for 3 months till he was 6 months old for the visitation I was promised.  Finally the agency had Julie contact me. We agreed to meet at a local diner in Oak Park.  We met for about 30 minutes, where both Julie and Bill were very agitated and very jumpy. It was easy to see they did not want to be there. After that meeting they wouldn't keep in touch again! So again I fought with the agency.  Finally they agreed to send a picture a month and sometimes they even did. On Christmas, I bought the baby and his adopted sister some gifts only to find out the new post office box they claimed to have opened wasn't theirs - it wasn't anyones! It was in the name of a lady named Mary Bobeck who had closed the box 9 months before. So who are Julie and Bill?  Are those even their real names? Iím not sure. But the scary part is that this is becoming a wide spread problem and it needs to be stopped. 

So what can I do now? Fight with the agency again?  Fight with the agency all the rest of my life? The answer is no! Itís time the public had a chance to see this. We must open the publicís eyes to the cold hard truth of adoption:  the pros, the cons, and everything that can happen if youíre not made aware of your rights. Too many people will take advantage of a young naive girl in a bad situation, and it has to stop! Please help me on my crusade to end this nightmare.

(Another instance of an open adoption closing. Another instance where it was probably NEVER the adopter's intention that the adoption would remain open. If you can help Beckie in ANY way to regain access to see her son, please contact her at tricocigirl519@aol.com  )


 
 
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