Independent Adoption, Private Adoption Agencies
- Why Not?
Are you experiencing an "unplanned" pregnancy or is your
single ("unwed") daughter pregnant? Would you like to
know about the pros and cons of independent adoption or private
(or church-sponsored) adoption agency?
In countries like Australia, adoption is generally regulated and
handled through government agencies. Prospective adopters are not
selected until after a baby has been born AND many weeks have passed
(allowing the mother to recover from birth before making a life-altering
decision) AND both parents have relinquished their parental rights.
Adoption Policy and Practice -a Comparison between North America
and Australia by Evelyn Robinson, MA, Dip Ed, BSW )
The way infant adoptions are handled in Australia protects the
prospective adoptive parents from having their hopes dashed when
family members decide to keep their family together. It also protects
the natural family members and their child from unnecessary separation.
The professionals who handle adoptions do not profit in any way
from an increased number of "transactions" and babies
are not treated as commodities.
However, in United States, there are "private" adoptions
in which individuals who are hoping to get a baby independently
try to locate a "birthmother" and convince her to make
her baby "available for adoption" (turning her child into
an orphan on paper by legally abandoning him). There are also private
adoption agencies and adoption attorneys. These agencies stay in
business by finding babies for people to adopt. Many agencies profit
directly from each infant "adoption" - from what is really
baby brokering. Others get donations for the "charitable"
work of finding babies for customers. With so many people willing
to pay good money for babies, most agencies offer "open"
adoption as a way to lure mothers to surrender babies they would
otherwise keep and raise themselves. Whether an adoption is open
or closed, adoption has serious consequences - somebody's gonna
lose their family member. Whether the adoption is open or closed,
there is no guarantee to the natural family that the adopters will
remain friendly or the adoption remain "open".
Naive mothers, fathers and grandparents-to-be may be drawn in by
the slick sales pitches of the "professionals" who "counsel"
and manipulate them toward surrending their child, all the while
making them believe surrendering parental rights was their "plan"
and their "choice". The natural parents and grandparents
are never told the truth - that a mother and baby separated at birth
will be affected for life. And people who adopt through these businesses
may be lied to about many things as well. As time goes by (and that
cute little baby grows older) they may find that adoption of an
unrelated child is not at all what they thought it would be.
Many of the people hoping to adopt are looking for a baby to use
as a replacement for their own baby that died or as a replacement
for a child they could not concieve or carry to term. In that case,
the child is usually forced to pretend her own family does not exist
or is of no importance to her, to keep the adopting people happy.
But how often do those seemingly "nice" people "hoping
to adopt" through independent agencies and adoption attorneys
turn out to be drug pushers, child molesters or child pronographers?
The real family is never advised to hire a Private Investigator
to check out the prospective adopters and yet a thinking person
might think it to be of utmost importance. A "home study"
is really only a formality and does little to protect the child.
So if you are an expectant mother or father - or your daughter
is pregnant - think twice about putting your baby up for adoption.
Single pregnancy need not be turned into a crisis. Try to find real
help and keep your family together. It's a tragedy that so many
Americans are being scammed by individual prospective adopters or
by independent adoption agenices.
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